If I were to ask nearly any non-believer 'what is God?' the near unanimous reply would be "God is love". If I were to ask then 'what is love?' I would receive a multitude of varying replies mostly having something to do with tolerance for their sins. The question then to ask is 'doesn't that mean that love is whatever one wants/needs it to be?' or better 'that God is whomever we want/need Him to be?'. What kind of god can we ourselves make up? Is your wife whomever you wish her to be? Is your son? Is there any other working relationship that you know of that is determined by what you wish it to be? Are we not individual? Do we not have structure and backbone, interests and opinions and needs of our own that you yourself have to accept navigate and familiarize your self with? Isn't that the beauty of relationships? Why should it be any different with God? We love God because he first loved us. It was not our minute and varying personal perceptions of God with which He loved us, it was His gigantic eternal design for present and future, a love that would redeem us from our sins and set us aright into eternity. It was not our selfish 'I need you to be this' love or 'do this now for me or else' love or 'if you even exist' love for His love came before our love. What then is love? God is love? What is God? Creator and perfecter and possessor of our souls in whom no darkness dwells and in that He is absolute love.